Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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