soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I just had sex on a roof
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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