I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize