wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Randomize
