No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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