Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
