I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
