It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize