im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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