its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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