i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
