I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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