And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Randomize