We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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