We're like a lot better than the average bears
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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