Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Randomize
