Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
