we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
