I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
