yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
