ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
