they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
