Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
