i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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