Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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