i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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