i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Bring me that man meat
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
