He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
