My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
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