i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize