Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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