I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
