best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Randomize
