shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Randomize
