what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
