I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
