So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
