i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
