i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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