when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
