well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
