trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize