we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
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