I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
