ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Found the puke drawer
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize