He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
