why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
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