i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Randomize
