Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize