Im at strip club and am horny
it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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