you would pick up someone in the library
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
