we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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